Here’s a fun paradox. When you’re nice, other people like you and good things happen to you, right? But when you say that you’re being nice because you want others to like you and good things to happen to you… that changes things.
Rephrasing, let’s say in this case, the action is ‘being nice.’
And the unavoidable result of that action is ‘people liking me.’
That result changes, when we add self-awareness to the action.
Meaning, if the action is ‘being nice and knowing people will like me,’ then less people will like me. Even though I’m still nice.
It’s like: I only want your gift if I know that you don’t want anything back in return and only then will I want to give you something back in return.
So do we only like people who have no awareness of themselves?
And if we are self-aware, should we pretend that we’re not?
Should you be nice? The answer is: Yes, you should be nice, but you must pretend you have no idea what rewards being nice will bring.